


North Star

by scamvnder



Category: Daredevil (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-12 16:44:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16876488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scamvnder/pseuds/scamvnder
Summary: 73. "You’re not the only person who’s hurting" and 66. When I say I want to be alone…I usually don’t want to be alone" with Dex?





	North Star

His apartment is dark save for the artificial glow sneaking in from his windows through the blinds. That by itself isn’t alarming. Dex prefers natural light, not that he’s ever outright told you that (he isn’t particularly outright with anything if it concerns sharing things about himself), but you suspect that the noise the LED light bulbs make when they’re burning bothers him. The sound like little insects if you listen hard enough. 

What’s concerning, rather, is the glass that crunches under your shoes upon closing the door behind you. Dex’s outbursts aren’t something you’re very familiar with, but you know that they happen. You’ve accepted that part of him a long time ago, and had even noticed that the occurrence of them has declined since you’ve been in his life. You’re the anchor that keeps him grounded. The constant he can turn to when things become unorganized and the objective looks hazy. 

His North Star. 

The sound of his therapist’s voice rings in your head just as your gaze falls upon his headphones and cassette tape. It sits haphazardly on the counter, like he had tossed it there, the headphones dangling and almost touching the ground. Dex had let you listen to them once after you had asked him how you could help; how you could understand him and his complexities. It was a vulnerable and raw moment for him, and it changed the dynamic of your relationship entirely. You knew from the beginning that Dex mimicked what he had seen other people do; not that his actions or words were someone else’s, but it was clear that weren’t authentic. Except that moment. He trusted you, still does. You just hope he remembers that when you find him. 

“Dex?” 

You call his name, but you don’t expect a reply. You’re treading in murky waters right now, every step could bring you further to the top or send you sinking to the bottom. However, as volatile as Dex can be, he’s got a certain level of predictability to him, and you know he’d never hurt you. That’s why you head towards the bathroom, already knowing how you’ll find him. 

He’s panting, his hands gripping the sink with so much force it turns his knuckles white. The vein in his forehead pulses with the beat of his heart, and his face is a shade of pink you know will only get redder the faster he keeps breathing. Sweat coats his body like a second skin, and it’s clear he’s been in here for awhile. At least since his outburst in the kitchen. 

You won’t ask him what happened. That isn’t your concern right now. What’s more important is getting Dex grounded again, pulling him back to Earth before he begins to burnout. 

“There you are. You’re not going to believe what happened on my way to work.” 

Dex looks at you through the mirror. Confusion and anger are etched deeply into his expression, his eyes hard beneath his brow-bone. You don’t falter. Dex needs a distraction, so you talk; touching various topics, like what you’re planning on making for dinner tomorrow and what you think of the new advertisement on the bus you saw today. It works, much to your relief. Slowly, he beings to return from whatever place he disassociates to. You’re sure it hurts when Dex finally loosens his grip on the counter, but he doesn’t make a noise as he flexes his fingers, restoring the blood-flow to them. His face slowly returns to normal color and within minutes he’s almost back entirely. 

Your gentle smile douses him like a bucket of cold water. 

“Welcome back..” your tone is sweet and calm and he finds it repeating over and over in his head until you continue, capturing his attention again.

“You don’t have to tell me what happened, and I’m not going to ask.” 

“You-” he runs his hand through his hair and inhales sharply, his eyes still a little too wild, “you shouldn’t be in here with me.” 

All you do is roll your eyes. Dex likes being in control, you know this, but you’re not about to abandon him when you know he really doesn’t mean it.

“You’re not the only person who’s hurting, Dex.”

Your words throw him, and for a second the fury returns, making his body feel like it’s been doused in gasoline and then ignited. You know from his tapes that his therapist had worked with him on empathizing with people; to take a step back and see things through the perspective of others is something he still has trouble with, but you help. This reminder stings, and sends what might be a genuine pang of guilt through his chest, making him momentarily lose his breath. 

“I know that you don’t want me to go…sometimes when I say I want to be alone, I usually don’t want to be alone, and I think you’re the same way.” 

The calmness in your tone never wavers. Dex is still fighting, still struggling with himself, but you’re getting through to him. You know this when he nods, the movement so minute that you almost don’t catch it. 

“Sorry.” Dex apologizes, the word tumbling from his lips with only a slight limp. He’s come leaps and bounds from when you first started dating, and you couldn’t be more proud of him for the progress he’s making. 

“Nothing to be sorry for. Although, I’m sure if you really wanted to, you could apologize to the picture frame.” Your heart fills when he smiles, a more than welcomed sight on his face. “We can clean up the glass in the morning.” You add, reaching for his hand. He meets you half-way, his fingers enveloping your own. 

“Alright, lets get you to bed, Poindexter.” 

He follows you wordlessly, comforted by the presence of his North Star.


End file.
